I’m going to get serious here for a minute. I rarely do these types of posts but this is something that hits close to home for me. You see, several years ago my mother died from breast cancer. She was initially diagnosed at the age of 38. I was about 16 years old I believe . I’m the oldest of 4 kids. My mom went through chemo, radiation, doctor’s appointments, etc. After a while they said she was in remission and eventually felt the cancer was gone. Then at the age of 50 she was experiencing terrible headaches that would not subside. The one was so bad she went to the emergency room in the middle of the night. They did a CT scan and told her her breast cancer was back and it had metastasized to her brain. We quickly learned it was spreading everywhere. She had spots on her lungs, and several other place. They gave her 2 months to live.
I watched my mother who was fussy about keeping a clean house and almost always had a home cooked meal on the table become more and more helpless and have more and more pain. I watched the stress on my dad as he was the main caregiver but he also had to work full-time to pay for her treatments, keep insurance, pay bills, etc. My dad had a good paying job but even with that the bills piled up. Yes even with insurance. Thousands of dollars in bills. My mom even had a debt collector tell her that “those doctors saved your life and your not going to pay your bills!” The thing is the doctors didn’t save her life. No fault of their own the cancer was just too aggressive. My parents were paying the bills, $10 a month on every bill which still equaled a few hundred dollars a month.
My mother got to the point that she needed help with everything. She could no longer eat, she couldn’t even sit up on her own. Hospice became involved. My mother wanted to die at home and my dad did everything to make sure he fulfilled her wishes. And he did. My mother passed in a hospital bed in our living room.
My reason for telling this story now. I kept seeing daily posts about Joey Feek. Prayers for her, support for her and her family, praise for her husband, etc etc. There should be, there should be prayers, I’m glad people feel for the family. But please remember that many families deal with this every day. They’re situations have added stressers though. Some don’t have insurance, some don’t have the money to pay for treatment, caregivers have to make that painful decision of “Do I stay home and care for my loved one or do I go to work so I can keep the insurance, pay bills, and put food on the table?”. Some are single parents that have to worry about what will happen to their kids if they lose their fight. Some people have no one to lean on for support.
Please, when you share the “Light up facebook for Joey Feek” posts. And the “RIP Joey Feek” posts, and “pray for Joey Feek and family” …(and please do share the family is no less deserving) please consider adding “and for all those fighting Cancer” or say a prayer or send positive vibes to those every day people dealing with this shame situation”
I’m sorry you lost your mom Angie. I agree with your post. The Feek’s more than likely didn’t have the financial stressors that most do either and their support system was phenomenal. Most families dealing with cancer have to deal with the financial stress and while they may have a great support system, the entire country will not ever hear the story about their fight like we heard about Joey Feek.